say they’re going to interview a bunch of to replace and honestly there aren’t enough eye-roll emojis in the world. Now before all the fragile dingbats out there jump down my throat, let me stress that I’m not some anti-diversity bigot. It’s just that diversity for the sake of it is dumb, like eating for the sake of it or supporting for the sake of it.
What’s the point of dragging Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink or Sarina Wiegman down to St George’s Park for an interview when you know you’re not giving them the job, unless teasing people from minority groups is considered ‘progressive’ these days? It’s simple, just pick the best person for the job, you know, like keep forgetting to do, and stop worrying about everyone’s skin colour and genitalia, you big weirdos. Besides, if you hire a manager for their impeccable demographic credentials, chances are their tactical knowledge will be as sparse as post-Invincibles trophy cabinet. And at the end of the day, diversity’s the only diversity really need.
Like telling he’s rubbish now, this shouldn’t need mentioning but it obviously does. Sport is one of the most diverse industries in the world it’s a ruthless meritocracy, not a box-ticking, virtue-signalling Harvard University-style shambles. So to the FA, I say: sod your quotas and your tokenism.
You already wasted one golden generation by hiring a bunch of inept dinosaur managers. Don’t spoil another with this politically correct nonsense. I can’t stand this new trend of treating football kits like fashion statements.
These days, clubs go full on Gok Wan when launching their latest “ £90 eyesore, despite the fact the only people who wear them are kids and Jacamo-loving fat blokes who reckon Next “is a bit fancy for me, pal”. I mean most of their kit designers wouldn’t know good looking if Margot Robbie’s t*ts slapped them in the face. But why should aesthetics matter when you can slip a top on a failed ASOS model, wrap him in a Louis Vuitton trench coat and a cashmere scarf and pretend he doesn’t look odder than Steve Cooper’s horse mouth.
The new Liverpool home shirt for the 2024/2025 season features a Chrome Yellow pattern design. This is a modernised take on the legendary 84 Home Shirt, a season which saw the Reds become European Champions for the 4th time in Rome and the first English Club to win a Treble of major honours. You can pre-order it now for Thursday, May 16.
From £60 to £125 And then there’s the bogus marketing spiel. “Inspired by the spirit of the city” or “a tribute to the club’s historical resilience”. Give it up! You’ve just added a couple of diagonal lines and knocked off for the day.
Clubs even trot their players out like those makeup-choked toddlers at Texas beauty pageants to try and flag them. But I’m telling you, there’s precisely nothing about Lewis Dunk in a Brighton jersey and a pair of Ray-Bans that screams ‘vogue’..
