My mother's no-shortcut kare-kare

This week marks my mother's death anniversary — it has been four years since she left us. If you have ever lost a parent (or both), you will understand when I say that not a day goes by without thinking of them. It really is in the little things: their favorite song streaming in my playlist, a scent that lingers, or a phrase they would always say. For me, my mother is always in my thoughts when I'm in the kitchen.Before she got sick, the kitchen was, among others, her happy place. It was her domain. She had her staple recipes for different occasions, but one dish stood out — her kare-kare. She only made it twice a year, and those two dates were non-negotiable: once for my father's birthday and once for hers.That kind of tradition went on for years. She loved inviting her church friends over, making sure there was always more than enough to go around. Seeing people enjoy her food was her joy, and kare-kare was one of her most requested dishes.She was also very particular about ingredients. She believed that to make the best kare-kare, you had to start with the freshest meat — and for her, that meant going to the wet market early in the morning, around 4 a.m. She swore that was the best time to buy buntot ng baka (oxtail) because it was at its absolute freshest.I would drive her to the market half-awake and half-asleep, and she would proudly say, "The meat is fresh when you go to the market early." She had her suki, her go-to vendors, who already knew what she wanted. Watching her haggle and inspect every piece of meat and vegetable with precision was an art in itself. Oh, those were the times indeed.Kare-kare is one of those dishes that stands out in any Filipino spread. It doesn't need a supporting act — it's already a complete meal on its own, with tender meat, vegetables, and that creamy peanut sauce that ties everything together. I know a lot of us have found ways to develop our quick-fix versions, but today, I'm sharing my mom's no-shortcut kare-kare.If you have some time to spare and want to enjoy the slow, meditative process of making this dish the old-fashioned way, this recipe is for you.Preparation time: 2 daysIngredients:1 oxtail, sliced2 to 3 knobs of medium-sized ginger, sliced500g ground rice500g ground peanuts1/2 tsp atsuete seedsFish sauce (for seasoning)Peanut butter, optionalEggplants, slicedBanana blossom, sliced (rub with salt to remove the sap)String beans, slicedPechayBagoong/shrimp paste (Mommy liked hers sautéed with tomatoes)Procedure — day before:1. In a large pot, place the cleaned oxtail and cover with water. Add a few slices of ginger and bring to a boil.2. First boil: Discard the water, rinse the oxtail.3. Second boil: Repeat the process.4. Third boil: This is the final boil — simmer for 3 to 4 hours until the meat is tender.5. Separate the meat from the broth. Let it cool, then refrigerate.Procedure — on the day:1. Prepare the bagoong (store-bought is fine, but Mom liked hers sautéed with tomatoes). Set aside.2. Heat oil in a casserole, sauté garlic and onions.3. Take out the broth — scrape off the fat on top. The broth should be thick and gelatinous. Add this to the casserole.4. In a separate pan, heat oil and stir the atsuete seeds for a few minutes, then add this to the broth for that classic kare-kare color.5. Slowly add the ground rice and ground peanuts, stirring until fully combined. Optionally, you may add peanut butter.6. Season with fish sauce to taste.7. Once you reach the desired consistency, add the sliced oxtail back in.8. Steam the vegetables separately.9. Serve the meat and sauce in one dish, and the vegetables in another. Shrimp paste on the side.Yield: Serves about 4 to 6.Thank you for everything that you have taught me, my dearest Mommy. You are always in my heart.***The author may be reached at kaycalpolugtu@gmail.com or follow her on Instagram @kaycalpolugtu and @aplateofbahaykubo.