This story is part of the July 14 edition of Sunday Life. See all 14 stories . Narelda Jacobs is a journalist, best known for being part of the former Studio 10 team.
Here, the 48-year-old shares her family history as part of the stolen generations, meeting her celebrity crush and her experience coming out. “What I learnt from Dad is that there is strength in vulnerability, and that you can change your mind later in life. You can soften and learn from those around you.
” Credit: Tāne Coffin My maternal grandfather, Douglas, came to Australia from Ireland and worked as a missionary in Kalgoorlie. I visited the city as an adult and Aboriginal elders remembered the family fondly. Douglas and grandma Evelyn died in the late 1960s, before I was born.
My paternal grandfather, Les Jacobs, was a seasonal worker in the York area of Western Australia. My dad, Cedric, spoke of sitting around the camp fire with him, singing and spinning yarns. Dad was taken from his family at nine years old in the 1950s.
He became part of the stolen generations under the assimilation policies in place in WA at the time and never saw his father again. Dad is one of five. The two eldest children weren’t stolen, but the younger three brothers were.
Dad talked about the Mogumber Methodist Mission, where he was taken, being hard work. Loading It was, however, run by good people. The violence and abuse you hear about didn’t really happen there, it’s just that they enforced a racist policy.
Dad had a great respect for Superintendent Clarke and his wife, who ran the mission, and Clarke ended up marrying my parents years later. My mum, Margaret, is of Irish descent. She became a pastor of her church, which is where she met my dad.
She supported him when he became a reverend in the Uniting Church. I had a very tight bond with Dad and I respected his achievements and learnt a lot from him. He helped establish the Aboriginal Evangelical Fellowship of Australia and was elected to the National Aboriginal Conference as chairman.
Dad was awarded an MBE in 1981 for his work with Aboriginal people. He was the same person whether he was talking to the governor or talking to people at the soup kitchen he ran with Mum. I’m the youngest of five girls.
I think Dad desperately wanted a boy, but when the fifth girl came out, it didn’t stop him from teaching us how to play sport, do gardening, farm work and tend to animals – all the things he might have done with a son. Jana Wendt was my celebrity crush in the ’80s, and the reason I wanted to be a journo. I got to meet her at the Logies when she was in attendance for a 60 Minutes milestone award.
I made a beeline for her and asked for a selfie together. I started to question the church when I was 14 and followed my elder sister Karen’s lead by joining a Pentecostal Church. My folks weren’t Pentecostal Christians and while Dad wasn’t entirely happy with our choice, he would have been happy we kept the faith.
My parents had homophobic beliefs, making it hard for me to be open about my sexuality. I told Mum [I was gay] when I was in my early 20s. What I learnt from Dad is that there is strength in vulnerability, and that you can change your mind later in life.
You can soften and learn from those around you. After the marriage equality vote was passed in Australia, Dad rang me. I asked him how would he feel if I were to marry.
He said, “I want my family to be happy.” It was the only conversation we ever had about my sexuality. Loading It was easier to fall into heteronormative stereotypes as a teenager and I did what was expected of me at the time.
[Jacobs married at 18 and divorced a few years later. She has a daughter, Jade Dalton, from that marriage.] I never considered there was another way.
I’ve been blessed to have beautiful relationships with women ever since. Marion and I were together for 16 years and she was like a second mother to Jade. They still have a very close relationship and live near one another.
I had two more relationships after that, both with fantastic, gorgeous people. Karina Natt and I have been dating for a year and five months. We met in the green room at Q+A when I was a guest and she was working for [Greens senator] Sarah Hanson-Young.
We had our first date on World Pride Day and are committed to one another. We look forward to a long life together. Make the most of your health, relationships, fitness and nutrition with our Live Well newsletter .
Get it in your inbox every Monday . Save Log in , register or subscribe to save articles for later. License this article Sunday Life Family Sex & relationships Indigenous culture Jane Rocca is a regular contributor to Sunday Life Magazine, Executive Style, The Age EG, columnist and features writer at Domain Review, Domain Living’s Personal Space page.
She is a published author of four books. Connect via Twitter or email . Most Viewed in Lifestyle Loading.
