CHOOSING a name for your child isn't easy and it can become even more difficult when you decide to honour family members. One expectant mum explained the dilemma she was having over her daughter's name. In a post on Mumsnet, the user shared that she wanted to name her baby after her mother-in-law.
However, she shared her concern that her own mum wouldn't be happy with the decision. "I have two other children and all of their middle names are honour names and would like the same for our third and last child," she explained. "I am now thinking of using my mother-in-law’s name as a middle name for this baby.
" The poster worried that it would seem "weird" to acknowledge her husband's mum but not her own. She shared more information on the relationship she has with her mum, explaining why she wouldn't choose to honour her. "I am very close to my mum now but growing up we had a very complex relationship due to her own issues and I wasn’t in her care for the majority of my childhood," she said.
"Even though we are close now it doesn’t feel right to name my child after her due to the complexities." She added that it wouldn't feel respectful to her dad and her other family members who helped raise her. The Mumsnet user also explained that her daughter will be her mother-in-law's final grandchild and "the only one that will be named after her.
" "I know it would mean the absolute world to her and she is a very hands on and involved grandmother to all the children," she said. Other Mumsnet users shared their thoughts on the situation in the comments section. "I think there’s a good chance your mum will be hurt, and it will upset your current relationship with her," wrote one reader.
"As the others have two middle names, then you could honour your mum and mother-in-law," said another person. "I don’t think it would be worth the risk of upsetting your own mum to honour your mother-in-law." CHLOE Morgan, a Senior Writer at Fabulous, has revealed her dilemma on choosing a baby name.
.. At 35 weeks pregnant, by far the trickiest part of pregnancy for me in the past few months (minus the insomnia and countless night-time wee breaks!) has been trying to decide on a baby name.
The dilemmas are endless...
My partner and I went for a private scan to find out the gender as early as we could - partly due to the fact we thought it would make baby naming so much easier because we'd only have to come up with a list of names for one gender rather than two. How wrong we were..
. I was absolutely thrilled to be told I was expecting the baby girl I'd already dreamed of, but being one of the last of my friends to fall pregnant, I've had countless conversations over the years with excited pals discussing their top baby names ..
.something which I wish I could go back in time and un-hear. With each friend mentioning at least 10 possible monikers, I can't help but feel like several are now a no-go even though I know it's something that none of them would mind in the slightest - it's a total me problem! The debate comes up time and time again on social media forums - can you choose the same name that was a "potential" for a friend's baby? It's a very divisive topic and opinions are always mixed.
..and I don't want to be THAT person.
While some will argue there's thousands of other names out there to choose from, others will say you need to choose YOUR favourite...
after all, there's no guarantee that person will even have another baby. Then there's also the issue of finding a name you adore..
.only to research it online and read one negative comment amongst hundreds of positives that you just can't shake off. I made that very mistake when I fell in love with a certain name (I won't reveal it because I don't want to ruin it for others!) .
..only to see someone point out that it constantly gets autocorrected on a phone to something rather rude instead.
So, back to the drawing board we went.. Just five weeks to go and it looks like our little one is going to be known as 'baby gal' for a little while longer! However, others couldn't see the problem, encouraging the poster to choose the name she wants.
"Just call her after your mother-in-law. There's no need to pussyfoot around it," pointed out one commenter. "No, not weird at all.
Both are grannies to your child, who really won't care if it's maternal or paternal line. Just use the one you like better," suggested another reader. "I don't see a problem.
She may be slightly miffed but it can't be a surprise to her you aren't wanting to name a child for her," wrote one person. "Give your child a name that makes you smile when you write it down on forms because it reminds you of someone wonderful," said another Mumsnet user..
