DEAR ANNIE: I live in New York City and have had a solid group of friends for the last decade. We’re all young, gay professionals in our 20s and 30s. A few years ago, an acquaintance joined our circle.
Initially, he was a nice addition, and we welcomed him with open arms. However, over time, I’ve noticed some troubling behavior. He has developed a habit of taking over social situations, often dismissing others’ stories or making negative comments about people he barely knows.
It feels like he’s trying to dominate conversations and overshadow long-standing friendships. More recently, I’ve learned that he’s been organizing vacations and social events without including me, often with people I introduced him to. When I confronted him about this last summer, he brushed it off as a “miscommunication.
” He expressed regret and assured me that he loves me and my family, but his actions don’t seem to align with his words. I’m unsure if I want to continue building a friendship with him, but I’m also not sure how to navigate this situation within my tight-knit friend group. What should I do? -- Left Out in NYC DEAR LEFT OUT: Ordinarily, I’d recommend direct, honest communication with this gentleman, sharing your feelings and attempting to iron things out.
However, it sounds like you’ve already tried and have been dismissed. Another conversation is more than likely to fall on deaf ears. Focus on the other friendships in your group where your effort is appreciated.
