We have less Sister Edith and more Elizabeth this week, which is excellent. If I wanted to see disaffected peasants, I’d watch a video of me and my wife staring at our grocery bill. We’re not out here watching depressing documentaries in these very upsetting times.
We’re watching Love Island . (Why did Rob choose those overalls ?) This is how I prefer to occupy my thoughts. This is why it was so delightful to see so many scenes with Minnie Driver playing her deranged but brilliant Elizabeth I.
I’ve gotten so sick of seeing sympathetic portrayals of Mary, Queen of Scots, where Elizabeth mopes in a corner over not having children. Here, Elizabeth does not give one single fuck about kids and is here to take over France and have French noblemen go down on her. All of this comes as a surprise to the Bourbons, who think Elizabeth is in the Netherlands.
But no, she’s at court as a prospective bride for Charles. Again, this is made-up nonsense , but we shouldn’t care. Elizabeth chatting with Catherine de’ Medici is my Wattpad One Direction fanfic.
Catherine is determined to make this marriage happen to further her goal of uniting France and ensuring peace. At risk of ruining that goal is Cardinal de Guise, who was baptized by Sister Edith last week and now agrees to spy for her at court. I don’t know how effective of a spy he can be when everyone is like, “Oh hey, the cardinal got baptized by Protestants and probably can’t be trusted now.
” Also, he’s being sup.