Do you know what is so great about Candy Crush ? It’s so basic, it’s so easy, it’s so simple to win. Fighting with Alexis Bellino is like playing Candy Crush . It’s just win after win after win, the phone vibrating in your hand, the candies shooting across the screen, increasing your dopamine and making you feel like you accomplished something even though all you had to do to be successful was like ten short swipes of your index finger.

That is what dunking on Alexis is like, and, much like Candy Crush in the middle of the 2010s, I am completely addicted. Before we get to hating Alexis (like dessert, I’m savoring it for last), we have to finish talking about Tamra’s storm-out; sorry, I mean Tamra’s stumble out of Katie’s dinner party. After she tells Katie to ask Ryan about the FBI, Eddie leaves the party, hugging it out with Ryan on his way to the car, and they both apologize.

Boys. They make every conflict so boring. The Lord Jesus messed up with my entire sex.

Tamra tells us what she knows about Ryan and where she got all the information. “There is an account on Instagram that broke everything down,” she says. Oh, Tamra.

The internet is made of porn and lies. If it isn’t one, it is the other, including this here recap that I basically invented. Don’t believe any of these things are in the show.

Or maybe you should, and it’s porn. I don’t know what gets you off (and I don’t think I want to). Back at the table, they ask Ryan about the FBI, and E.