This is an extract from a longer essay by Sarah Whiteside who is an Edinburgh-based writer of fiction and personal essays. She was the winner of this year’s Anne Brown Essay Prize, which is run in conjunction with The Herald. It grew out of reading and research Sarah did after learning her son is autistic, which led to a slow-dawning realisation she is autistic too.
The essay explores flawed social and scientific attitudes to neurodivergencce, as well as the effects these can have on the daily lives of autistic people. It is inspired by the work of writers, researchers and activists coming from within the autistic community who, looking at autism from inside as well as outside, are able to ask new questions that produce new answers. These voices show autism is not so much a set of deficits as a different way of experiencing the world .
An intimate and personal account, ultimately this essay is about the power of words and ideas to effect change in daily life. It shows that a more accurate perception of autism can lead to greater self-understanding and acceptance, as well as improving autistic people’s experience of everything from education to healthcare. Thin Slices I’m at the kitchen counter again.
Distant traffic passes. My son is at the table, eyes on a screen. A too-familiar soundtrack fills the room.
It sometimes feels like this will never end. Him there, me here, the same tinny music on a loop. He calls me over to show me what he’s built.
It’s a fortress, des.