If it feels like you’re spending every weekend at a (or shopping for one), you might be relieved to hear that are now becoming more popular. In fact, according to a of more than 400 moms, 13% of parents are requesting guests come sans-present to their child’s celebration, with half of moms polled revealing that they don’t want gifts or care if their kids get any. Though it might seem controversial to by not showing up with the perfect present wrapped in a big old bow, the trend has been picking up steam in recent years.

Instead of the , where guests each so they can pick out the present they really want, gift-free parties include requests for, you guessed it, no gifts at all. Of the 404 moms asked by the pros at What To Expect about their preferences, plenty prefer to keep the clutter to a minimum, and skipping gifts ensures they don’t end up with excess toys and stuff that will eventually end up in a landfill. Lots of moms want to be sensitive to other families’ budgeting needs, especially , when it feels like .

Still, even if a party invite specifies “no gifts,” 3 in 10 moms admit they’ll ignore it and still bring a present, with 33% of millennial moms doing this and 23% of Gen Z moms following suit. One participant shared that they “just don’t feel comfortable coming empty-handed” to a party, which is certainly understandable, given how can be. So what’s a mom to do when this celebration conundrum arises? “Your best bet is to follow their instruct.