Yes, I see you looking at me in the change room at the pool, your mammaries doing the cha-cha as you dry what would be your short-and-curlies if you hadn’t lasered them off. I’m so pleased you’re immune to shame while displaying your naked flesh, a relief map of the life your body’s traversed. My five-year-old daughter loudly identifies your “BOOBIES” while I scuttle away behind the closed door of the shower to change awkwardly in a puddle of foot fungus.
Each to their own. A change room is one thing, but being semi-naked has become de rigeur on the red carpet , in music video clips (think Katy Perry’s recent “feminist” trainwreck Woman’s World , which features a slow-motion close-up of her jiggling jugs), and even off-duty if you’re Bianca Censori doing her best impression of a smallgoods section at a deli. As a support worker, I took someone to see Miley Cyrus on her Bangerz tour in 2014, half-naked and writhing around on stage, humping giant soft toys, which felt less like an artistic choice and more of a gyrating expression of not being hugged as a child.
Loading Nudists celebrate the joy of being “free” from the oppressive restraints of clothing, calling themselves “naturists” – closer to nature – like only eating organic grapes ...
or exposing them. And Europeans, don’t get me started. You get your kit off when someone thinks the word “spa”.
Then there are the eccentric hipsters, gathering around burning men for some nude yoga and.