A round one in five pregnancies end in miscarriage . But despite it being a relatively common occurrence, it still feels like a taboo subject. It’s hard for parents to work out how to grieve the loss of a child they never met, and the life they might have shared – not least because this loss is so often minimised by others, from medical staff to a well-meaning friend putting their foot in their mouth .
“It wasn’t meant to be,” they might say, followed by a reminder that, “You can always try again!” Or even: “At least you know you can actually get pregnant.” Part of what makes this grief so difficult, and perhaps why it’s so easy for some to dismiss, is that there has never been a way to acknowledge the loss formally. Babies who are stillborn after 24 weeks of pregnancy must be registered, but this hasn’t been the case for miscarriages – which are defined as occurring before the 24-week mark.
But this is finally changing. In February, the government introduced a new scheme allowing parents in England to apply for a certificate to recognise babies lost through miscarriage . Initially, the scheme was only open to people who have experienced pregnancy loss since September 2018, but today (9 October) this has been extended to all parents who have gone through this, with no backdate.
It’s a free scheme, which doesn’t require medical proof – crucially, it’s not compulsory, either. There’s no right or wrong way to grieve. The simple acknowledgement o.