I drank too much and had catastrophic relationships with an emotionally abusive, controlling narcissist, a liar and an alcoholic cocaine user - and it made me a better psychologist

I drank too much and had catastrophic relationships with an emotionally abusive, controlling narcissist, a liar and an alcoholic cocaine user - and it made me a better psychologist By Dr Natalie Cawley Published: 06:55 EDT, 23 July 2024 | Updated: 07:01 EDT, 23 July 2024 e-mail View comments Sitting on the hospital bed, I breathe deeply into the paper bag. Watching it rise and fall and listening to the sound of it contracting and inflating helps me visualise my panic, and slow my breathing down. Thankfully — eventually — I get hold of my anxious thoughts and stop hyperventilating.

Panic over for now, I emerge into the corridor, only to find my boss talking about me outside. ‘You can send Natalie anything, nothing fazes her,’ she’s saying to another colleague. If only she knew.

For at the time of this incident, I was no patient in this hospital. I was a member of staff. And not just any member of staff: a trainee psychologist.

Often I represented the hospital’s entire emotional health and wellbeing service; the start, middle and end of many patients’ treatment plans, which typically extended across just six sessions over a few weeks. Dr Natalie Cawley says all psychologists have to have therapy themselves while in training In my career, I’ve treated many different patients: from men addicted to pornography to diabetics struggling with the psychological impact of losing a limb. My work often involves caring for the most vulnerable’s mental health needs, childr.