Dakota Johnson’s web is still connected to Chris Martin. “He was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders right before she died,” Johnson says . Wait, no — she was talking about a different thing there.

“The reports are not true,” Johnson’s rep actually told “ Page Six ” on August 16. “They are happily together.” Rumors that the two broke off their engagement from a Daily Mail report went viral earlier on August 16.

The report claimed Johnson was walking her dog without wearing her emerald engagement ring, but Johnson’s opinions on green objects are famously ever-shifting, so we don’t think that really counts as evidence. Slightly stronger evidence showed that Johnson hasn’t attended any dates on Coldplay’s European tour this summer. But maybe she was just bored of hearing songs written about Gwyneth Paltrow.

Either way, evidence be damned, these two crazy kids are still pushing through. Now ask Martin what he thought of Madame Web ..