On Sept. 25, we observe National One-Hit Wonder Day, and to celebrate these singular bangers and irrefutable earworms, we’re matching a song to each member of the zodiac. For our intents and purposes, a one-hit wonder is defined as an artist who becomes so well-known for a single recording that the celebratory glare overshadows all of their subsequent offerings to the gods of song.
Special thanks to the brilliant astrologer Elise Wells of Planet Poetica for aiding and abetting our understanding of the relationship between zodiac archetypes and these beautiful — albeit brief — flashes of musical genius. Read on to learn more, and see here for the epic power ballad that aligns with your sign. ARIES (March 21 – April 19) Aries folk are about as subtle as a piñata full of ball gags, and this song spells out a crass word for semen in the title.
It’s an in-your-face, fist-pumping banger that begs for more and more — and then delivers. TAURUS (April 20 – May 20) Mungo Jerry: “In the Summertime” Ruled by Venus, Taureans live by the pleasure principle, and this song celebrates all manner of earthly delights: sunshine, dinner, drinking, driving easy love, and easy living. Can dig.
The opening grunts even sound like lazy sex, the preferred pursuit of bulls. GEMINI (May 21 – June 20) Snow: “Informer ” Ruled by Mercury and living loquaciously, Gemini finds their spirit mirrored in a fast-spitting song that is as maddeningly likable as it is utterly incomprehensib.