“Obviously there are upsides to being the single most beautiful woman ever to have lived,” says Cleopatra, queen of Egypt. “I haven’t had to pay for a drink since at least 50BC. And it’s very flattering that people are still talking about how attractive I am after literally 2,000 years.
That’s not going to happen to Kim Kardashian, is it? Ooh, did I say that out loud?” The fabled beauty is speaking ahead of the launch of her new reality TV show, Cleo: Who's the Mummy? which she hopes will show the world the real Egyptian queen after what she believes to be two millennia of dodgy takes from the mainstream media. “The trouble with my level of fame - and it’s something that these modern day celebrities will just never understand - is that people make up the craziest stuff about you,” says Cleo. “I mean, I love Taylor Swift, but has she had a play written about her by actual William Shakespeare?“ That’s why Cleo has invited the cameras inside her golden palace for the first time, in the hope we’ll see that really she’s just one of us.
.. albeit much better-looking and more important.
”Oh, I do loads of really normal stuff,” she says. “Having a laugh with my maidservants..
. pranking Roman emperors..
. But all people want to talk about is bathing in donkey milk – which is great for your skin by the way – and my relationship with Mark Antony. Which is over, the loser.
” One thing the Egyptian enchantress does do to keep it real is play Mecca Bi.