“I am crying while I watch this. I feel understood for the first time in my life,” wrote a woman after watching the TEDx talk “Invisible Diversity: A Story of Undiagnosed Autism” by Carrie Beckwith-Fellows. It was as though the speaker, who has autism, had turned on a light in a dark room and people there, many in their 60s and 70s, understood why they had been "bumping into the furniture" all their lives.
Another listener said, “I am 73 and just realized I am autistic after younger relatives were diagnosed. A lifetime of beating myself up for my inability to fit in is over. Praise be to God.
” Most of the 2,620 comments on YouTube to that TEDx talk were similar. “I was 66 before I realized I was autistic. What a relief! A long life of feeling guilt, but now I am just me.
” Another, “Thank you! So tired of being labeled selfish, insensitive, rude, just because I relate and communicate differently. Inattentive, because of sensory processing issues. And lazy, because of meltdowns (when really I worked so damn hard all the time, just to fit in).
Thank you!” MUSC student pursues MD and doctorate while representing autism community People are different. That’s commonplace. We applaud someone’s unique voice, singular capability or distinctive style.
But the differences these autistic people speak of rarely bring distinction. They are often perceived as rude or uncaring or just plain strange. Those differences include not wanting to hug, avoidance of eye contact and literal interpretation of speech, which misses humor, sarcasm or metaphor.
Loud noises or bright lights can be painful, some have intense interests or enthusiasm for particular things (vacuum cleaners for one autistic person I know). For some, it is “stimming” movements such as rapid hand-waving, jumping or fluttering fingers. In recent years, increasing recognition of neurodiversity has helped us understand that some peoples’ differences are not related to culture or personality, but to the fact that their brains are wired differently.
When neurodiversity was not recognized, many who acted in these ways — and were teased, shunned or bullied for it — felt shame. They learned ways to mask behaviors that were considered odd or unacceptable. Well-meaning parents customarily forced on their children social skills that were unnatural to them so they would fit in, but that were like an emotional straight-jacket for the child.
Because autistic individuals develop social and language skills on a different timeline, they may have been slow in school, another source of shame. As the quotations above indicate, it may come as a huge relief to discover that they are neurodivergent — that there is an organic basis for behaviors that are different from their “neurotypical” family, schoolmates or colleagues. Hope for Hooves Rescue continues to instill hope four years since it opened The official name of this particular type of neurodiversity is autism spectrum disorder.
It is common to refer to someone with it as being “on the spectrum.” That was confusing to me for years. I thought of a spectrum as a straight line, ranging from mild at one end to severe impairment, where an autistic person is without speech or severely disabled.
Beckwith-Fellows explains that the autism spectrum is not at all like a straight line. “Autism is like a kaleidoscope of colors that blend into one another,” she said. Each autistic person has a different combination of traits, abilities and disabilities.
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The level of difficulty a person has with these traits will shape where they fit on the spectrum.” Autism is a spectrum of conditions that may not be obvious until they are, advocates say What are some of the traits shared by autistic people which they handle differently? One is how information is taken in. Some autistic people are “bottom up” learners rather than “top down.
” That is, when they enter a room, the autistic person is aware of all the details equally: the curtains and colors and clutter along with the Steinway grand piano, and that can be overwhelming, even oppressive. “We need time to think through things and sort out what is important,” said Dr. Devon Price in his book “Unmasking Autism.
” Likewise with sounds: the confusion of taking in all noise at once requires forced attention to process what’s significant. “Autism is like living with everything on full blast,” said Beckwith-Fellows. Some wrongly believe that autistic people don’t feel emotions.
But Beckwith-Fellows testifies that in fact it’s just the opposite: autistic people have intense emotions. “I can feel emotions intensely — I’m talking 200, 300, even 400 percent stronger than other people — but I can’t identify, I can’t name them.” Being super-charged with emotion but not able to distinguish anger from sadness, pleasure from fear, creates “utter chaos,” she said.
“So what is autism like to live with? For me autism is all about anxiety. It’s about intense emotions, and it’s about living with a brain that does everything it can do to control my world around me.” She was diagnosed with autism at age 35.
With the diagnosis, she was able to fully accept herself for the first time. And after hearing her TEDx talk, one much older individual wrote, “I finally understand that I’m not broken like I always thought. I am different from what society demands.
I just wish I could meet other autistic adults, to feel free to unmask in their presence.” Elders may find relief, even celebration, in realizing that neurodiversity is as important in the great scheme things as biodiversity. Another commenter on the TEDx talk, not an autistic person, wrote this benediction: “These beautiful people are a gift to humanity; understand them and learn more with them.
Love, Light, and Compassion to them all.”.
