I, like so many of us in this glorious economy, do not own my own home, and thus am unable to decorate or design said home to my liking. Instead (for better or worse — oftentimes worse) I spend time looking at other people's renovation jobs, which are posted all over the internet. Obviously, I love to hate watch people who are richer than me decorating the houses that I cannot afford in ways that I would never choose to decorate them.
And I know I'm not alone here, so bear with me while I indulge in being a hater for just a second. Below, you'll find all the design trends that I absolutely hate; and you'll be able to tell me whether you agree with me or not! "Julia," you'll doubtlessly tell me in the comments, "I can do whatever I want with my home!" Yes. And I can think it's ugly.
But in the interest of letting The PeopleTM have a voice, I am giving you the vote: you can tell me, below each opinion, whether I am justified, or am I absolutely wrong. 1. Floating staircases.
I feel like I'd fall off the landing and break my head open. 2. Exterior spotlights.
Your house isn't the Parthenon. Can they be beautiful? Sometimes! But I don't need to be forced to look at how beautiful you think your home is. Also, light pollution is ugly.
3. Doorless showers. Doesn't water get everywhere? 4.
Stark white / all neutral / "Millennial grey" décor. 5. Recessed lighting.
Cold and sterile. Hurts my brain. Buy yourself a lamp.
6. Ridiculously high ceilings. This is very subjective and I recognize that.
But sometimes high ceilings just make it all too cavernous . Why am I surrounded by four towering, blank, white walls? Why is the Rockefeller Christmas tree in here? 7. Smart appliances.
My fridge does not need an app. My oven does not need an app. My microwave does not need an app.
MY MUG DOES NOT NEED AN APP! 8. Faux fur throws. Plastic sucks! Just get a well-made normal blanket.
9. All-black exteriors. Sometimes I like it.
But it depends on the environment. In the middle of the woods? Cozy-modern! In a SoCal suburb? I'm baking just looking at it. 10.
Excessive use of colored light bulbs. I'm going to confess something: I in fact own these and use them in moderation (I like warm lighting)! But getting too wild with it makes even the most beautiful home look like someone's dorm. Why is your living room blue? 11.
Banana and palm trees in biomes that do not naturally have banana or palm trees. 12. All-glass houses.
I can see you in there. Get curtains. 13.
Modern, bland, grey-blue or pre-distressed area rugs. I think this is part of the Millennial grey thing. Truly wealthy people, please bring back expensive, hand-made oriental rugs.
They're gorgeous and you're the only ones who can afford them. Please. For us.
14. Stark marble floors with no rugs. They're too white.
They're too shiny. They scare me and they make me think you have zero original taste. Also, I feel like I'm in the foyer of an office building, not your beautiful home.
15. And finally, turf. Turf, my enemy! The bane of my existence! You won't be able to convince me on this one, I'm afraid, even with the "it uses less water!" argument.
If that's a concern, just plant native plants — I fail to see how plastic is better for the environment. If you have opinions on any other home design trends, feel free to tell me all about it in the comments down below. If you think I am wrong about everything, of course, you're welcome to say so.
Or if you think I am right about everything (which of course, I am!) feel free to tell me that, too!.
